While a full length interview with life coach Elyse Santilli will be coming out right here in the coming months, I wanted to first give you a low down on the beliefs and foundation behind her program that has it made it so popular for thousands of happiness-seekers around the world. Knowing Elyse personally, her course is a reflection of her rational, passionate, romantic and incredibly intuitive nature and she really is a “cut the bullshit” kind of woman, in the most gentle of ways. Her work resonates with me because her methods are not aggressive, but free of ego and inspiring. Here are the five lessons I learn from Elyse Santilli that can make anyone’s life easier, immediately!
1. Rethink success
Firstly, success is simply a one-way perspective we have been conditioned to believe. In actual fact, success is not the money, house, body, degrees or medals we have. Success is whatever we define and feel it to be. Success is being in love with life and living your purpose. When you feel alive, happy and at peace, you are a living and breathing success. We all have our moments of doubt where we let our minds trick us into thinking there is this rule book of success in life, be aware and consciously dismiss any thoughts that are intrusive to your state of peace and happiness. These thoughts are only discouraging and counter-productive to our true desires.
2. Forget about “Normal”
Normal is also another misconception. Elyse says, “There is no such thing as a normal human, but there is such a thing as a “normal” you – when you’re completely yourself, you love yourself deeply and you think and act in ways that feel aligned with your soul.” As the saying goes, we would have been created the same if we were meant to be the same. The things that make us different are our greatest strengths. Imagination and vision are unique to every single person on this earth and that gives us an incredible gift to make big changes in the world – proven time and time again throughout history. Embrace every part of the authentic you, because the world needs you to be “normal”, not cloned, beaten down or dumbed down by society.
3. Reaction is our best friend and biggest enemy
We can take one of two roads when life throws us a curve ball – react emotionally, from a perspective of ego, judgement or sub-conscious conditioning we learned as a child, or we choose a reaction based on love, understanding and faith. Either way, life will still happen. In that moment, our reaction will determine whether we have a good or a bad day, and whether we create a memory of that moment as a tarnished painful one, or a surrendering loving one. We need to give up the idea that life is happening to us, and rather life is happening FOR us. Our choices now, create our future, and like a domino effect we need to decide to perpetuate feelings of gratitude, positivity and joy over resentment, negativity and sadness.
4. Stop Running
Before I quit my job, I would plan a holiday every chance I’d have to take time off. I couldn’t wait to get away and feel “happy” again, after all, I’d deserved it. I had consciously chosen to suffer for the majority of my time, because that was what I was taught was the right thing to do. I then had to plan these escapes to feel joy again. When we come from circumstances where anything is possible, why do we choose to suffer and then run from that suffering? We need to create a life around us that we don’t need to run from. We need to create a life where every day feels like a gift. It is such a personal thing. Some people love and thrive in a routine, while others need constant change and variety (like me). Whether you love numbers, writing, art, people, management, adventure, entertaining, helping, problem-solving – none of it is wrong! DO WHAT YOU LOVE. Create a life you don’t need a holiday from.
5. Let go of who you are
You are not your social class, job title. ethnicity, religion, partner, owner of certain possessions or achiever-of something. The problem is, by being so defined by these labels, if any of them cease to exist, you will feel lost, confused and often unworthy of love.
You are a unique spirit, unconditionally loved regardless of those things. You need to disassociate yourself with these labels in order to really know your own soul, feelings, and dreams. You need to stop basing your decisions on the external pressures or expectations of others, and start living for the real you. There is an entire world out there to chase what is in your heart, and you will always be loved and guided no matter where your journey takes you. It isn’t a race, but an endless experience of joy when we live from love, faith and courage. Harness the fear and find yourself again.
Find out more about the program and Elyse’s work here!